Obituaries

You might say this is a case of poetic justice: infamous bone snatcher Michael Mastromarino has ironically died of bone cancer. He was 49 and serving time in prison for his crimes, which were some of the most outrageous ever:

Brooklyn's bone snatcher has died a ghastly death — from bone cancer.

Michael Mastromarino, who made millions by harvesting skin and bones from corpses, died at St. Luke's Hospital Sunday morning, a state Corrections Department spokeswoman said.

The bone cancer had spread to his entire body, sources said.

"It's full circle, baby,” said Vito Bruno, whose father’s organs were sold by Mastromarino after his death from kidney cancer in 2003. “Karma's a bitch."

Some more background about this world-class creep. At least Alistair Cooke got his revenge:

When he died, in March 2004, he left his daughter 150 pounds or so of ancient flesh and bone. Kittredge, a Congregationalist minister in Vermont, was not unfamiliar with such things. She had prayed over many of them and had counseled parishioners never to cherish a corpse but to view it only as the empty vessel, a rather worthless item. Disposal, she explains, “is not something I’m inclined to spend a lot of money on, so I grabbed the phone book and started going through the Yellow Pages, looking for the best price on a direct cremation.”

She found a place in Harlem that advertised “the highest quality services at the lowest rates”—cremations for only $595. Kittredge remembers that “it was the middle of the night” when they came. Alistair Cooke was taken down from his Fifth Avenue aerie to a dim, decidedly gothic parlor at 115th Street. “They were just going to come and collect him and return the ashes in due course,” Kittredge recalls. But instead, there was a man waiting for Alistair Cooke, with a knife. He cared nothing for Cooke’s mind or manners. He had actually come for the body—that pale, wizened, cancer-ridden cadaver of a 95-year-old Englishman, stretched out now beneath the light in the embalming room.

Rot in peace, you asshole "doctor."
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Actor Joe Conley, who was featured in the television series The Waltons, died yesterday at the age of 85.
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Not exactly an obituary, but the remains of 1970 Kentucky Derby winner Dust Commander were found a few days ago, and they were reinterred at Churchill Downs today:

Verna Lehmann finally returned Dust Commander to Churchill Downs on Monday, nearly 22 years after the death of the 1970 Kentucky Derby winner.

“We did want it years ago. We’re just so happy that we got him back home,” said Lehmann, the chestnut colt’s owner.

Dust Commander was originally buried on Springland Farm in Paris, Ky., following his death Oct. 7, 1991, but the property was divided after a change in ownership and the remains were found at Woodline Farm. Nothing distinguished the champion’s burial spot, in stark contrast to his new resting place in the Kentucky Derby Museum’s garden area.

In working with the new Thoroughbred Breeders Museum, based in Paris and co-founded by Lehmann’s granddaughter and husband Cristal and Hardy Dungan, Dust Commander’s remains were located last Friday, exhumed and transported to the museum.